Monday, March 23, 2015



Hola Geishanistas!

Spring 2015's new trends are waiting to be plucked like the first tulips of the season, but here's the catch. (There's always a catch.) You'll def want to look like a fresh-cut bloom and not yesterday's sod. (Or even worse, clearance rack mulch. That's just stinky and hurts everyone's eyes.)

Pull off Seventh Avenue's finest by translating the best of what's walking down the runway (colors, patterns, fabrics, etc.) into what actually works well on you. Novel idea? I'm a firm believer in NOT acting your age and feel there's always a way to incorporate trends ... if you stay true to yourself.

So keep it real, chicas. I repeat: mulch is never the end goal, especially when days are longer and hibernation goes into er, well, hibernation. It's "see and be seen" season so to quote my beloved Tim Gunn, "Make it work!"

Be bold, be daring, be the quirky, risk-taking fashion beast you were born to be ... only be all that after a careful once-over in a full-length mirror, please. Remember, style's an extension of one's personality — without saying a word. (Let's not make those unspoken words four-letter ones.) Trends, conversely, can easily end up wearing you. Kinda like a 22-carat diamond, but I can deal. (Please and thank you.)

Check out my must-haves (as well as a few that simply intrigue me), but it's up to you to figure it out!

1. Shirtdresses
Aunt Georgina wore'em and you will too. With slits to the sky, dropped waists, and delicious details, these are anything but a throwback to the days of Donna Reed.

(Yes, I'm beyond obsessed with their collection.)

2. Urban Safari
Talk about born to be wild. From camo-inspired to fern patterns and khaki chic, bust out the binoculars as the Serengeti comes to you.

Modern twist on "Out of Africa" ... courtesy Ralph Lauren.

3. Statement Stripes
Crisp, graphic, and playfully placed, designers across the board showed their true stripes — strategically sizzling in every imaginable silhouette.

Givenchy gives good stripe.

4. Shoulder Power
Ditch the image of David Byrne (Talking Heads) in that way-famous, wide-shouldered suit he wore circa 1980-something ... au contrere. Bared, bronzed, and bodaciously buff, shoulders are now the new navel.

Balmain bad-assery at its best. 

5. Gingham
Mama mia! Picnic tables and calzone cooks aside, designers are thinking out of the checked box with subtle hues, large graphics, and cool fabrics.

 Sexing it up via Diane von Furstenberg ... we're not in Kansas anymore.

6.  Yellow
Just the mere mention of this color would normally make me run shrieking. Yellow's the stuff bumble bees, taxis, and crime-scene tape are made of, but who can resist this kind of sexpot aplomb in marigold? Not me. (NOTE: Fire up the spray tanner for an added boost.)

Cushnie et Ochs ... how hello-yellow's done. 

7. Military Chic
Femme fatale meets fatigues as army glam is responsible for the coup in your closet. At ease, bitches.

Ten hut ... with Marc Jacobs. 

8. Haute Hippie
From fur vests (yup, fur) to florals, it's all about that luxe 70s look. Next stop, do the Hustle.

Nobody does it better — Gucci. 

9. Kimono-Style
It's a wrap as traditional Japanese garb influences an influx of trench coats, dresses, and tops. My geisha-by-choice heritage is honored, designer-san.

Clover Canyon is all about that Pan-Asian feel.

10. Obi Belts
Another nod to my ancient sistas from ancient mistas. Tie one on with the chicest waist cincher this side of Little Tokyo.

Isabel Marant's tight take on the obi. 

11. Shoes
Forget fakakta flip-flops. It's all about boots and booties, baby, particularly knee-high cage styles. Who cares that it's a sweltering 100 degrees? Keep your feet locked up in these knee-high gladiator-inspired styles for an uber-cool edge — it's paradise for foot fetishists everywhere.

Divinity thy name is DSquared2.

12. Accessories
From ass-kickin' brass, mismatched earrings, and romantic bijoux to revamped 70s and powerful statement pieces reflecting a woman's inner strength, there's a plethora to pick from. IMO, the on-trend choker gets me, well, all choked up.

Even more Balmain bad-assery ... does it ever end? (The answer? No.)

Find more of my daily style picks on Twitter @GEISHA_MANIA (and Instagram too @ladygeisha_geishamania)!

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Tuesday, March 17, 2015


Happy St. Patrick's Day, MacPeeps! My bonnie ol' grandmother, who hailed from County Cork, would sing "Danny Boy" in her thickest brogue, wear monochromatic green, pass out paper shamrocks, drink a bottle of Hennessy, kiss way too many strangers, and call it a day. Jeez. As much as I adored Granny, let's not get nuts. I'd NEVER speak with a brogue. (That's the geisha side of the family rearing its pasty-faced head.)

However, I'm happy to share some of the chicest ways to celebrate this side of the Blarney Stone. No doubt they'll give scads of cheap "Kiss-Me-I'm-Irish" buttons a bling-y run for their money. Take note and break out the Dom ... let's save the Hennessy for Granny. Bless her wee soul.

Pick me up in this hot hunk o' steel and I'll DEF let you kiss me. (Once.) 
Hand over the title and keys? Baby, IT'S ON. (Oh yeah.)

Even Debbie Harry clones watch the parade in holiday-appropriate garb ... 
just make mine mink. Please and thank you.

Pre-parade festivities go well with the mink. (Hint, hint.) 

Start spreadin' green cheer (as in Benjamins, you big boozer) 'cuz this is 
the ONLY post-parade spot the spirit-of-the-day would approve of.

How head-to-toe green is really done ... size 0, of course.
Courtesy Elie O'Saab.

Oh, my, what big emeralds you have! If you're packin' 206 carats 
of this kinda' heat, rest assured you'll get lucky. V-e-r-y lucky.

Here's the ideal spot to give me that big-ass emerald. RENT. IT. OUT.

Why would Erin go braless when wench-wear's so much fun? (Especially after an 
emerald the size of Kilkenny.) Get ready to dig for my pot of gold.

Keep it flowin' Papi ... I might even bust-a jig.

Irish lads and lassies can't resist cake pops as enticing as these ...
until the real dessert is served. (We ain't talkin' Baileys.)

No words except ... GIMME WHAT'S UNDER THAT KILT.
You luscious little leprechaun.

When I come out from under the above-mentioned kilt.

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